Wedding: Honouring loved ones who are no longer with us.

We all like to think our love ones are invincible. However truly we all know this is not the case.

For some of us we have lost love ones who had had a huge impact on our lives, whether it be friends, grandparents, parents or extended family. These are people that will never be forgotten. So it only seems fitting that you pay tribute to those individuals in your wedding ceremony. After all it is a huge day that you will remember for your lifetime.


So exactly how can I pay my respects?

There are many ways you can pay your respects to those with us in spirit, if you are looking as a public dedication you may like to consider one of the below options.

1)     Candle lighting

As part of your ceremony you can have some candles set up near the alter. The officiant can say a few works and you as the couple can light candles to represent each individual that is no longer present. Another great idea instead of you as the couple lighting the candles you can have a significant other such as a partner, or child of the individual that passed light the candle, it is a great sign of respect and love.

2)     Photo Display

Within the ceremony space you may also choose to have a photo display set up. This is great as it will give the opportunity for guests to be able to see the beautiful faces of those who made such an impact on your lives. It also can be a beautiful decorative feature in your ceremony space which can then be transferred across to your reception space.

3)     Chair Dedication

A beautiful idea that I see as a growing trend is saving a seat to honour those with us on the day in spirit. Couples choose to either place a photo on the chair or there are many great poems, paragraphs that can placed into a photo album and placed on the chair in memorial. You can either have on chair to represent all the individuals or separate chairs for each individual, this is a complete personal choice. 

4)     Memorial paragraph

You may opt to have your officiant say a few words and have a moment silence to honour those loved ones. This can be worked in with any of the above options or be a simple standalone option and can easily be words into the start of the ceremony during the welcoming of all family and friends. 


However you may like to pay a private dedication to a loved on as well and may like to consider one of these options:

1)     Wearing a wedding day item

Some couples have held onto a bow tie, a piece of jewellery or a veil of a loved one that you may choose to wear. This will ensure that they are with you ever second of the day and is a very subtle and personal tribute.

2)     Having a photo with you

There are many creative suppliers out there that have made it possible to carry an image of loved ones with you on your wedding day. This can be in a piece of jewellery that is attached to a bouquet, photos attached or made to be part of the shoes you wear and even photo cufflinks.

3)     Working some advice into your vows/speech

Some people leave such a profound impression on us that we never forget the words that they have spoken. In some cases the advice that was bestowed should no be kept to ones self and should be shared with the world. You may choose to have some of these words worked into the ceremony or speak these words to each other as part of your vows or even your speech later in the night. You may choose to say where you received these words or just state the words, knowing in your heart whom they originated from.


Why is it a good idea to mention these loved ones in my ceremony?

It is up to you if you wold or would not like to mention loved ones as part of your ceremony.

Having a little something, if it is said or on show or even a private nod is a great way to show how much they mean to you and that you are thinking of them, and that you know that they are watching over and protecting you.

Another reason to consider, and even though your wedding ceremony is not about your guests, it is also a nod and a great sign of respect to surviving relatives, spouses and friends, giving them all an opportunity to remember.


Remember it is your day and should be done your way, discuss all your options with your officiant and as a couple. If you are choosing to go ahead with a memoriam choose something that is unique to you.

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